pessimist

i am one of the most pessimistic people i know. i hate it. i'm the person who writes sullen facebook updates in my head but never posts them because people will think i'm a depressed bitch. i'm not depressed, and i hope i'm not a bitch. nevertheless, many sullen facebook updates still get past my reasoning in my head.

this morning i woke up with a nasty tooth ache. not just a tooth ache, but swollen gums, and a jaw i can't open wide enough in which to stuff a burger (not that i want to stuff a burger in my mouth, but i couldn't think of anything else to describe the lack of being able to open my mouth). i also woke up remembering my son wanted to nurse nearly every hour during the night. so already i was in a sullen, bitchy mood. i am clearly not a morning person. when i went to his room to nurse him, again, i found him soaked with pee and his hair standing straight up on his head, plastered in spit up. awesome.

so this is a great start to my week, and i just can't get my thoughts over this tooth ache. currently, the pain is so HELLO I'M HERE AND I AM GOING TO HURT YOU that i just can't imagine it ever going away. have you ever had pain like that? i mean seriously, i look ahead of my life twenty years from now and i still see this god awful tooth ache, and possibly years of painful and expensive dentistry. i might die, too.